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I have always associated paddling with big brothers and superheroes. Sport for those who think in Cape Town over the weekend and who think Brett Cavanaug is a misunderstood person who loves beer. Although I grew up on Lake New York and have always been involved in water sports (OK, Growing Up), I never thought paddling could be a good form of exercise for me.

Then last summer I went down a river in northeastern Utah for a week-long hiking trip. It was the first time I had ever paddled a paddle, and I was outraged by the results. Although I spent most of the week brewing hot beer, I was still in good shape for almost ten years, losing almost ten pounds. Psychedelic mushrooms certainly can’t thank this new form, so it must be a paddle.

When I returned to New York, I knew that I could not go back to my old ways. This cubicle cow has been transformed into a big bad father.

I started looking for a row machine under the strict criteria that I was able to fit in my NYC apartment, and it had to be as sexy as. There was no way for me to get a fitness equipment that would take up the expensive floor space of my apartment.

Ergata Rover suitable for the apartment.

Getty Images / EyeEm

That’s when I found out Ergata paddle. Made in the USA, it is made from locally sourced cherry wood and is related to medieval furniture in my apartment. It also folds and stands upright so that I can easily store it in a corner. But the best part of Ergata is that my jealousy of the city is far from over. Unlike any other form of exercise I have ever taken in my life, Ergata has treated me like a regular user.

Ergata charges itself as a gaming company. Yes, they are in the paddle industry, but their main product advantage is a digital interface that engages the user in a variety of physical activities. When a user first logs into their account, they are asked to adjust their fitness level by padding the first 1k. Ergata then offers pressure training programs designed to improve and monitor your overall fitness, as well as session training to help build endurance. The nature of the competition is my favorite. Ergata automatically fills runners based on your personal preferences, but I prefer to oppose users who are a little better than I am to continue to improve. If you feel bad for yourself or if you have been drinking a lot the night before, you might choose to compete with others who are not as good as you are.

It brings me to the most important point on this machine – the Ergata paddle, no matter what shape it is, is an amazing exercise. Paddle is a low impact exercise that involves more than 80 percent of your body weight. The next day, you may feel out of shape and begin to see immediate results without feeling like you have been hit by a truck. It doesn’t matter if I feel tired, cramped or hungry – I’re recording for 15 minutes on a stretcher and under the age of five. It relieves stress, gives me energy, and my girlfriend is even willing to have sex with me. My skirt is stretched.

Ergata paddle video game-esque interface.

If you look at the surprisingly rounded situation Ergatta Facebook Team, you see what I mean. There are, of course, some elite paddlers in the community, but they are mostly people who have been slowly declining in their office over the last few decades and are embarking on a new fitness journey. And just like me, I can see that everyone is fully engaged with the new row machine and is getting the results they want.

I just finished my 30-day trial and lost about 20 pounds, and now I can return to the clothes I bought five years ago. My stomach looks flat, my hands are tense, my posture is improving. I’m glad to know that in less than 30 minutes from my comfort zone I can do a life-changing workout, all while listening to my favorite Pandora’s station (another feature presented by Ergata).

I know what you are thinking now – “I am completely sold out by your inspirational story and I am ready to dive into it. Well, here’s the skin. The $ 2199 entry point isn’t really cheap, but if you think of it as a nice piece of furniture, it’s definitely within range. It is worth noting that it costs $ 29 a month for your membership, so if you have a gym membership, it may not be the best choice for you. However, if you, like me, do not want to be transported to a gym during a pandemic, you can buy a machine for $ 62 a month for less than $ 0. And Get $ 200 and cool swag if you buy between 11/16 and 11/29 (see promotion below). The best part is that if you use it for 30 days and you are not a big bad father like me, you can get that waste back and live a healthy body.